Life Can Be a Little "Tire"ing

This is a life has come full circle type of story.

About 35 years ago, Rick's sister, Julie, and I were going to spend part of our Christmas break from school taking her younger brothers to see their dad in Monterey for Christmas and moving the youngest brother to Monterey to live with their dad.  Rick wasn't with us since he was serving his mission in Canada at the time.  We felt pretty good about our ability to handle this adventure.  We were both 20-something, so we were definitely all grown up and ready to take on the world.

Me, with Julie, David and Steve, New Year's Eve 1986

I'm not sure where I had been, but I came home the night before we were to leave to find Grandpa Jones at my parents' house.  Grandpa Jones was Rick's grandfather, his mom's (Lorraine) father, so finding him at my parents' house was very unusual and surprising.  After he left, my dad let me know that he had come to talk my parents out of letting me go on this trip.  If I didn't go, the trip would be off, since we were taking my car.  Grandpa Jones didn't feel it was appropriate or safe for two 20-something young women to travel alone from Utah to California unaccompanied except for two teen-age boys.  

Well, as was once explained to me by my LDS bishop during my turmoil filled teenage years, my father wanted to raise daughters that could make up their own minds and could take care of themselves and could use good common sense, so what Grandpa Jones said didn't sit well with a man who wanted to raise daughters to be independent.  (I sometimes wonder if my dad has ever regretted his child rearing strategy.)   After listening to Grandpa Jones' concerns and suggestions, my dad had politely dismissed his concerns and said as my father, he knew we were as well prepared for the trip as we could be and would be okay and beside I was old enough to make up my own mind.

My dad, Henry James Dickamore, with me.

But something must have gnawed at the back of my dad's mind and the next morning he did something totally unexpected.  It was a Sunday morning and instead of getting ready for church, he took my car to the mechanics shop and had it completely checked over.  This resulted in brand new tires on my car since there was enough wear on them to make him concerned about our driving up over Donner's Pass and through the Sierras during the winter, even with the snow chains I had previously purchased.  How grateful I was for my dad using his greater knowledge and wisdom to prepare us for our trip, especially as on our return trip home we did encounter bad weather the whole way and ended up heading south towards Los Angeles and through Southern Utah instead of the normal northern route through Tahoe and Wendover, so we could avoid the worst of the storms.

Rick sitting on my cute, little Cavalier, 1988

Now let's fast-forward those 30-plus years.  Our child was taking his family on a trip with his in-laws.  He asked if he could use our trailer so they could have a place more secure than a tent to sleep in.  We agreed and Rick and I spent the next month making all the minor repairs, replacements and additions to the trailer and our Suburban we knew needed to happen to prepare the vehicles for the trip.  But the memory of Grandpa Jones and my dad kept playing in my mind and I kept bugging Rick to check the tires.  He over and over told me that the tires were fine.  He had checked them over and over.  Finally to prove his point, the morning of the big adventure he hooked the trailer to the Suburban and drove it back and forth in our driveway to show that there was nothing wrong with the tires.  He then unhooked the trailer and took the Suburban to the gas station to fill up the tank and get gas for the generator, where he proceeded to have a flat tire on the Suburban that resulted in four new tires for the Suburban and new tires for the trailer as well.  

Rick with Hunter in Monterey, 1991

There are a few of lessons I take from this experience:

1) We always need to be as aware of the inside as we are of the appearance on the outside.  From the outside, the tires looked to be okay, but when jostled or added pressure was placed on them, they crumbled because the inside had fallen apart.  Sometimes we put on a good show and make everything appear on the outside to be okay, while inside we are falling apart.  While this falling apart or emptiness may not be visible to everyone, I believe that our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ are always aware of us and will help us receive what we need at all times.

2) In times of need or concern, through the power of the Holy Ghost, we will have experiences or thoughts brought to our minds to help us through the difficult times or helps us be better prepared to face them if we tune our minds to listen for those promptings.

3) I am so blessed to have had great men in my life who love me and want what is best for me.  Men who have prepared me to experience life and who have listened to me and trusted me to use my judgment and talents and wisdom to make my own choices to grow and become who I am today.  From my Heavenly Father and on to my husband, I know I am surrounded by love.

The Journey Is Measured in Memories

“Travel isn’t always pretty. It isn’t always comfortable. Sometimes it hurts, it even breaks your heart. But that’s okay. The journey changes you; it should change you. It leaves marks on your memory, on your consciousness, on your heart, and on your body. You take something with you. Hopefully, you leave something good behind.” – Anthony Bourdain


About two years ago, my mother-in-law sat at our table during Sunday dinner and made a pronouncement.  This in and of itself was unusual, because she is not the type to make any type of declaration.  Knowing that she was speaking to a group of newlyweds who were in the business of starting their families, the funniest part was that the next summer no one was to be pregnant.  Why?  Because she wanted to take a family trip that would include all her children, grandchildren, respective spouses, a special friend, and her great-grandchild.  (At the time there was only one, so the "don't be pregnant" statement was good advice, and two more great-grandchildren were planned for, announced and born before the trip.)  In all we ended up with 26 people on an adventure that took place one year ago this week.

One of Gigi's (Lorraine, Grandma, Mom) requests was a family picture.  Jessica Friend Photo Design did an amazing job.

The other request was for a family dinner.  We decided on pizza on the patio of our hotel during a rainstorm.

The first hurdle we faced for the adventure was deciding what type of vacation to take.  A family cruise was the original proposal, but it didn't take long to determine that for some family members, that may not be the best option.  Finally it was decided to head to Florida and encounter DisneyWorld, Universal Studios and NASA.  Then the biggest hurdle faced - finding a date that would work for everyone.  We were juggling three school district schedules, three university schedules and multiple employment demands that had to be met.  There were times we thought we would need to give up or postpone to another year, but finally everyone was able to resolve conflicts and the date was set.  At this point we "met" Monnika and Whitley with A Touch of Glitter Travels in Orlando.  They were amazing to work with finding options for airplane tickets, transportation (two 15 passenger vans) and hotel accommodations (Hawthorn Suites by Wyndham) that provided everyone the space they needed, as well as fun little surprises to welcome us to Florida.  We were so blessed to have them to do all the legwork for us.  

Sitting here a year later, in the midst of a pandemic that has closed businesses, limited travel, with an increasing sense of isolation from family, my heart is full of memories of that whirlwind week that strengthened family ties through laughter and drama, excitement and exhaustion, storms and sunshine.  I am loving the posts on social media other family members are sharing of their memories of that fun-filled week.  As my mother-in-law recently commented on one post "Trip of a lifetime."  

To me, it was priceless.  We juggled luggage, car seats, strollers, vehicles, mealtimes and naps.  Everyone pitched in and supported each other.  No one had to be a single rider if the didn’t want to.  Someone was always willing to go along.  The time spent together as a family, making memories, building and strengthening relationships, fulfilling wishes and dreams is something that will never be replaced.  We all came home exhausted from fun as the thousands of pictures document and we all have our stories to share.  Watching my children joke around with each other and their cousins, first airplane flights, seeing Zora's face light up as snow fell on her during the Frozen show, Lela's joy as Pooh Bear complimented her on her shirt, Emily's wish fulfilled to see Cinderella's castle, meeting Phil and being able to thank him for his unending support of Rick's brother, David, during his battle with cancer, Disney ears and daily-themed shirts, and Rick being able to spend time with his siblings are a few of the many things that made the week unforgettable.

Our family really looked forward to Universal with Harry Potter and Superhero themed rides.

Winnie-the-Pooh has always been a family favorite, even for the newest generation.  (Check out our family shirts)

We celebrated Lela turning 18 while we were there.  We joked that this was Grandma's way of celebrating her graduation from high school and her milestone birthday.

 I have the cutest grandbabies. 

Playing in the rain.

Gigi's Gang Is In The House

Yo-Ho, a pirate's life for us.
A very favorite moment was the whole gang riding the Pirates of Carribean together.  We sang the whole way through.  

Bucketlist Item - Check

Where Do I Go When the World's Turned Upside Down?

When the British were finally defeated at the end of the Revolutionary War and Cornwallis surrendered his troops to the American and French commanders, tradition says that the British bands played the song, "The World Turned Upside Down".  There are multiple lyrical versions of the ballad, but this one appeals to me because it reminds me of a nonsense song:

If buttercups buzz'd after the bee,

If boats were on land, churches on sea,

If ponies rode men and if grass ate the cows,

And cats should be chased into holes by the mouse,

If the mamas sold their babies

To the gypsies for half a crown;

If summer were spring and the other way round,

Then all the world would be upside down.

How many of us have times when we feel like the world has turned upside down?  Right now the CoVid-19 pandemic comes to the forefront of our thoughts, but each of us will face times when we have our foundations shaken and we have to rethink what normal is for us.

The night our house was destroyed by fire, Rick and I felt nothing but overwhelmed and numb as we tried to know what step to take next.  As we lay in bed, we turned to the one source of peace that has never failed us.  We turned to prayer.  I don't remember the words that we said in that prayer, but I do remember the absolute feeling of peace that came over us and the assurance that in time all would be well.

Now with all the upheaval and chaos I am finding in my life due to the Corona Virus and resulting CoVid-19 pandemic, I find myself turning again and again to my Heavenly Father for guidance in what to do.  It is hard to do things that do not come naturally to me like being separated from my loved ones; to not see them and hold them daily; to not be able to celebrate birthdays and graduations; to not greet friends and neighbors with a handshake or hug, but to maintain a distance from all and communicate through technology, not just for my own safety but for theirs.  How can I find peace in this situation?  This is not who I am!!!!

Then I thought of a loving Heavenly Father and His Son, the Savior of the World, our brother, Jesus Christ, who knew that to grow and progress, we would need to be separated from Them for a time as we came to Earth.  Just as the despair Rick and I felt at losing our home was understood and comfort and guidance given, no one knows  better the pain and loneliness I am feeling now at not being able to have my family around me the way I want than the Savior who gave us the greatest gift of all, His gift of the Atonement.  This is the gift that we are preparing to celebrate at Easter.  

Click on the link to read more about the Atonement.  

I hope you enjoy this beautiful song.  It is one of my favorites and this arrangement/production is just for us today.

Here is the original video for Peace In Christ:

A Note to Remember

 In 2010, I started this blog as an experiment to see if I could blog as a way to journal my thoughts and feelings.  My primary audience I thought would be my children.  But five days after that first post, our family experienced a life-changing event when our home was destroyed by fire.  After that, West of Zion became a place for me to document the miracles and blessings of the rebuilding of our home and by extension the feeling of safety and security for our family.  Since that time, my blogging has gradually declined to the point that I've only published a post a half dozen times in the last 5 years.

Our family is coming up on the anniversary of moving into our rebuilt home.  Anniversaries help us remember where we have been and help us celebrate what we have accomplished.  Today I was reminded of our approaching anniversary when a friend reached out on Facebook and asked for some positive thoughts to help calm her mind.  My thoughts immediately went to a card she gave us when our house was complete.

I'm sure she didn't intend it to be, but this message has gained great significance to me in the subsequent years, almost becoming a touchstone for my thoughts.  It is a reminder that life is full of sweetness and spice, but there are also times when things aren't so good.  It is in those dark times that we need to hold on to our faith, the true light in our lives, and support one another.

Word of the Year 2020

Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not.  Doctrine and Covenants 6:36

Each year I try to pick a word or phrase that I can use to guide me through the coming year.  This activity helps me focus my thoughts and feelings on what I have done and what I wish to accomplish.  It is a process of evaluation that is more general than a resolution, but it helps guide me and direct me as I set goals throughout the whole year.

2019 was a pretty amazing year.  While there were so many ups; two new grand-babies, a family trip to Orlando Florida, and Lela graduating high school and going to college are just a few, there were also some pretty big lows.  The most serious of these was a mysterious illness that Rick contracted the first of October.  I have never seen my giant of a husband laid so low.  One doctor referred to him as conundrum, because so many of his symptoms were contradictory.  These symptoms were determined to most closely resemble Leukemia or a form of lymphoma.  How that opinion knocked the wind right out of us.  How grateful I was for family and friends who offered us support.  How the decision that no, it wasn't cancer, but a virus he would eventually recover from, left us feeling overjoyed and humbled at the same time.

There was one day when I had things I NEEDED to do, but Rick could not be left alone because his heart rate was so high.  Also because of his heart rate, he could not do more than ride in the car, no wandering the aisles of the grocery store.  I felt I was at my end.  I told Heavenly Father I couldn't do it anymore; it felt like it was more than I could bear.  Heavenly Father heard my prayer.  NO, Rick was not miraculously healed, but Emily came home and sat with her dad.  While at the grocery store, every person that I needed to talk to just happened to have stopped by the store to pick something up, so I was able to cross my phone calls off my list.  Then the store didn't have something I needed and I didn't know how I was going to find the time the next day to get it.  Who should cross my path, but the exact person who was able to go to the back and find what I needed.  I left the store that night knowing that the I was a beloved daughter of Heavenly Father and that my elder brother, Jesus Christ, knew my heart and was ready to help my through this trial.  How grateful I was for that reminder.

We've now had three weeks of Rick appearing to improve.  His heart rate has returned to normal.  He put some weight back on and is able to eat.  He is driving again and back to work full-time.  He even went for a walk on the treadmill.  New Year's Eve happened.  Rick came home from work and said he felt stuffy.  Understandable, all the family time we've had this year has allowed us to pass a cold around and back again.  We decided while the kids partied, we would have a cozy, quiet night at home.  Rick went to pick up burritos from our local Costa Vida for dinner.  When he got home, he was gasping for breath.  Sure enough, his heart rate had spiked again.  Hours later, it was still higher than it should be.  This morning when he woke up, it was back to normal, until he walked to the kitchen and then it went right back up. 

I am sure that this is just a blip in the overall recovery from the previous illness, aggravated by this cold.  The doctor (specialist) told us to expect six to eight weeks to recover completely and Rick has a follow-up appointment in a couple of weeks.  But thoughts of "what if" entered my thoughts this morning as I sat in my living room looking at the beauty out my window and pondering the new year. 

In the Book of Mormon, Nephi tells his father that he would go and do what had been asked of him.(1 Nephi 3:7).  He didn't say this because he knew everything was going to perfectly work out or even how he was going to accomplish what had been asked of him.  What Nephi did know was that the Lord was aware of him.  Nephi knew that nothing would be asked of him that he could not accomplish.  So Nephi did not doubt, took the leap and acted in faith.

As these thoughts and memories circulated in my mind, an idea coalesced and I knew that my Word (Phrase) of the Year for 2020 will be: 

ACT IN FAITH!!!!  

Life has no guarantees.  A friend shared this quote by William Arthur Ward, "This bright new year is given to me to live each day with zest, to daily grow and try to be my highest and my best."  As I look to each new day in 2020, I will try to remember the lesson from the grocery store.  As I look to each new day in 2020, I will remember to look to my Savior in my every thought and fear not.  As I look to each new day in 2020, I will remember Nephi's example to ACT IN FAITH.  Through this year, I hope to strengthen my relationships with my family, develop stronger friendships, increase my testimony of the love my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ for me and more fully understand the Atonement of the Savior and how it applies to me.

May all of you find in 2020 those things that are most important and that will bring you the greatest joy is my humble pray.